GSJG_Post

So this has definitely been long overdue. I've been meaning to give updates regarding God Speed, John Glenn, but when ever I sit down to write I feel so confident about the film that I tend to talk about the unknowns or the next phase of my life instead.

As of right now, we're roughly half-way through the editing process for our film. I have heard a wide range of differing opinions regarding the film from, 'it doesn't cut well together', 'it looks like crap', 'OMG it's amazing', to 'this is going to come out really well!' As far as I am concerned, I love the film except for one scene that I ruined. I know I did, and I still have nightmares about it because I wanted to go in tight on the actors but failed to compensate for distance. I won't mention what scene, because I'll see if you can spot it when I can finally post the film on here.

Film students are a tricky group. We tend to be overly insecure and yet, we also are the most judgmental group of people on the planet (I mean, who else would rip apart all-time greats like, Chinatown, 2001, Jaws as so forth). And it's funny to think about it, because who are we to judge? I know I could have done better on God Speed, John Glenn, hell everyone could have. But that's why we are here. Mistakes are acceptable. Failure is okay. But only under the condition that you learn from them.

And when I look back on it all, I wouldn't trade my most glaring mistake for our best shots. I would rather have not shot our most distinguishing shots and keep the mistakes; even if only because it keeps me humble. I know I have some talent, and I know the 'wow' shots will come. But if I don't error, then how am I to grow? And because of that, I take this one scene in particular and I break it apart. I judge myself on it and I let people rip me apart, and I know that if I run into a similar situation again I will not repeat those mistakes - and make up for my past errors by doing it right.

And with that in sight, I do not look at the criticism I have received as a negative. Everyone here has a voice and most are more than willing to express it. I don't mind if people think I'm the biggest idiot at this school because it will only push me harder to succeed. And if it's me against the world, then so be it. But I won't quit, I will just take it one step at a time, one problem at a time and eventually I will reach the top and I will arrive.

I realize I have spent a good portion so far talking about the negative side the film. This isn't to say it's a bad film. Contrary, I have received a lot of great responses from the majority of our class and especially from our instructors. I intended to shoot this film differently than what I think Full Sail has seen in that past. We didn't have an overwhelming budget, and the set was rather bland (we didn't have a lot of set dressing or things on the walls) so I went in tight on the actors. We had a limited time-budget too, so we didn't have nearly as moving shots as I wanted or the use of the jib because of those time constraints. An example of some of the things we did, and forgive me if this doesn't make any sense, was we shot our talent from about 4-feet away with a 135mm lens and I gave the camera a kinetic movement by playing with the panhandle (I think our camera operators thought I was out of my head within the first few hours we started to shoot, haha). How this translates (and this is not taking into account the Matte Box) is stand in front of a mirror about 4-feet away. now walk to about a foot-and-a-half from the mirror and crop yourself from the tops of your eyebrows to just above the bottom of your chin. Add in a console, headset, shirt and tie and you essentially have 3-minutes of our movie. That's freakin' tight - and despite some people not initially being receptive my initial choice of lens selection, it's those types of shots that people keep raving about!

In the end, I can say that this project has been extremely successful. Despite some difficulties (we easily had more issues to deal with than the other groups) things came out better than I would have expected. Now does this mean the movie is how I visualized it? The answer is No. But like director David Fincher says, "99-percent of filmmaking is compromise," and now I can completely understand what he means. In the end, this project turned out extremely well and while it's not going to win any awards or be recognized for breaking any barriers, what it represents to me is something so much more.

From some outstanding acting (most notably our lead talent) to our set design (yeah is bare, but we completed it) to implementing CG (it's a lot harder than I ever thought) and so forth. This film truly represents my senior thesis. Can I do better, Yes. Easily. But after this experience and having the privilege to work with some outstanding people, I can honestly say that I am a better filmmaker and a better person for it. This is a difficult profession, but I know what it takes and I know I have it in me to succeed. Now it's just translating that into reality.

And as you'll be able to judge for yourself in about another month, you can see what we accomplished. Is it another student film? Yes, but at the same time I think there are some things that will surprise a lot of people and probably some things that will make you cringe. But as stated before, it's okay to fail. At least for now. And with that in mind, I know that despite a lot of mixed feelings about this project that in 5, 10, 15-years, the people who constituted the whole of this movie will be able to look back on it and be proud of what we accomplished, despite their current feelings toward it.